The New York Times and Washington Post are reporting that when President Trump left Turkey after the Nato Summit, he secretly switched planes to evade a possible Iranian attack, leaving the press to unknowingly serve as decoys on Air Force One. The Washington Post reported that he was transferred from Air Force One to another plane in a catering truck.
The New York Times more picturesquely described Trump transferring transports by means of a “catering container“–one of those large enclosed boxes that we see at airports. I’m going with the Times‘ account here, because it’s much more fun to imagine him riding in a container than a catering truck (though a catering truck would be pretty humiliating too).
I have so many questions about Trump riding in a catering container. First, I assume there are no seats in catering container, so what did he hold on to (besides a handy Secret Service agent)?
More importantly, if, as is likely, there were snacks in the container, how did they lure him out when he arrived at the plane? Did they tell him that he and the Secret Service detail could take as many bags of potato chips and pretzels as they could carry? Did they tell him that burgers and fish sandwiches and chicken fingers and fries were waiting for him on the plane?
And how did they tell him that the catering container would not be traveling on the plane with them?
Finally, how did they handle the fact that the press was on the other plane–on Air Force One–and that he wouldn’t be able to insult journalists during the flight, and in particular wouldn’t be able to berate female journalists for being mean and stupid, not smiling, and asking nasty questions? Did they have to distract him with TV and a nice comfy, nappy chair? Did some of the crew members of the plane on which he was flying have to pretend to be reporters so that Trump could insult them? And did they have enough woman pretend-journalists for Trump to demean?
So many questions. But I have faith that in the coming days, White House leaks may get us the answers.