Somehow, I missed Trump’s State of the Union address. I don’t know what led to that omission. Could it have been that Trump said it was going to be long? Could it have been a reluctance to endure what I anticipated would be a long night of lies, empty boasts, and rebukes of political enemies by a racist, criminal grifter bent on chaos, disruption, and the destruction of everything that I care about? Could it have been that I figured the U.S. men’s hockey team would be there? Who knows. There were so many reasons to take a pass on the speech.
But my failure to watch it doesn’t mean I can’t comment on it. So here goes.
One of the big themes of the night was how well the U.S. is doing under Trump. As he put it, “A short time ago we were a dead country, now we are the hottest country anywhere in the world, the hottest.” This, of course, is a tribute to Trump’s environmental policy. And this heat is something we’ll no doubt be exporting. “USA, USA, USA!”
He also pointed out that the economy is “roaring.” Don’t let those pesky federal economic reports tell you otherwise. We’re all just one little delusion away from euphoria.
Trump also castigated Democrats for focusing on “affordability.” It’s all a big fake, and anyway affordability problems are the Democrats’ fault. So there.
But the important thing is that inflation is way down. Soon stores will be paying customers to take stuff off the shelves. And gas prices are so low that gas stations are ashamed to sell gas at the prices Trump recited. So they aren’t.
To sum up, Americans are doing great. And Trump is doing even better. How could we have an affordability problem when Trump is getting richer by the day?
As for those silly people complaining about grocery prices, what are you going to believe, your eyes and bank account balances, or our dear leader? (Note: It’s always a good political strategy to minimize the importance of what people care about. This is a well-known strategy of gaslighters–especially abusive boyfriends. It is tried and true, and I hope and expect that Trump will continue to work it right up to the midterms.)
In short, as Trump said, “Our country is winning again. In fact, we’re winning so much that we really don’t know what to do about it. People are asking me, please, please, please, Mr. President, we’re winning too much.”
This happens to me all the time. Win, win, win. Nothing but winning. So much winning that I get depressed and wonder, “Am I winning too much? What should I do about all this winning? Golly, if only I could lose for once.”
Now, to wrap up. (I don’t want to go on too long. That’s Trump’s thing.) It has been noted that Trump referred to Ukraine only in passing, and didn’t refer to the Epstein files at all. I am sure that this was an oversight, or maybe a favor to Trump’s friends, including Vlad for Ukraine and a bunch of billionaires for the Epstein files. Friends should help each other out, right? Anyway, why talk about such topics? They are downers.
The State of the Union address is an occasion for celebration, boasting, and lying, not sad stuff. As such, this was a great address. Maybe the best ever. Nice job, Pedo.