In his 18-minute, speed-read address tonight, Trump said that he has worked to “slash prices on drugs and pharmaceuticals” — drugs and pharmaceuticals! — “by as much as 400, 500, and even 600%.” As any number of smarty-pants cognitively unimpaired people have pointed out, a 100% reduction in a product’s price makes it free. So price reductions greater than 100% would mean that the customer gets paid.
As PolitiFact helpfully explains, a mere 200% reduction in prices would mean that the pharmaceutical company would pay the customer the full price of the drug, and a 600% reduction would mean that the pharma company would pay the customer five times the full price of the drug.
So Trump’s heroic efforts will be a boon to everyone who is worried about rising insurance prices or who just needs some extra cash for date night. You don’t even need to ingest the drugs. Just get as many prescriptions as your doctor is willing to write for you, go to the pharmacy, and collect your dough.
Brilliant, brilliant! Thanks, Mr. President.